SOCIAL DISTANCING 2.0 Sydney loves its essential workers, but preferably from a safe distance of 120km
BY: Kartya Vucetic
Sydney has once again reaffirmed its commitment to valuing essential workers, just not enough to let them live within the city limits.
Anglicare Sydney recently published its Rental Affordability Snapshot report, and concluded that across NSW, only 1% of rental listings were deemed affordable for essential workers in Greater Sydney.
NSW has it bad, but it appears that so does the rest of the country | Image: Anglicare
The report confirms what we’ve all quietly suspected: being an ‘essential worker’ is now a lifestyle choice defined by chronic debt, long commutes and a guarantee of work during global pandemics.
With the average Sydney rent now sitting around $875 a week, most teachers would need to share a two-bedroom apartment with at least three other colleagues, a Bunsen burner, and a sense of quiet rage.
Welcome to your new home if you’re the backbone of this country
Hospitals are facing similar problems. Nurses are now being forced to travel from hours away, which is great news for patients, as long as your cardiac arrest lines up with the train timetable on a strike-free day. Some hospitals have reportedly started offering staff accommodation, which roughly translates to a swivel chair behind the triage desk.
But rather than address the issue, the city seems content to treat essential workers like rare Pokémon, visible only briefly before disappearing somewhere past Penrith.
Nurses might as well be regarded as the new ultra-rare Pokemon Go!
“Teachers are the backbone of our state,” a government spokesperson said, before suggesting they relocate to regional NSW and “just vibe it out”.
Meanwhile, the same residents who complain about ‘staff shortages’ in schools are also busy bidding $1.2 million for a one-bedroom apartment conveniently located across from one.
Still, it’s reassuring to know that in a city fuelled by irony and desperation, the people who actually keep it running are at least getting the recognition they deserve. Just not a place to live.
Editor’s Note: Quotes in this article are used for the purposes of satire, however, all other assertions are factually correct at the time of publication.
