PRIVACY TOUR Robbie Williams takes a walk around Sydney Harbour with entourage. Moans about the paps.


Bob is getting old. He’s at that stage in life where there’s so many things to moan about. There’s having an estimated net worth of 300 million, mansions all over the world, travelling by private jet, international fame and recognition, adoring fans and an entourage of helpers to satisfy your every whim. Oh you think they are positives? No no you are wrong, these are the things that make Bob sad. If only he could live a simpler life without all the excesses he’d be a more well adjusted person. He’d prefer it if you could pretend you don’t see him when he walks around Circular Quay with his entourage and just treat him like anyone else. If the paps could also just fuck off too Bob would be much happier. Stabbie bastards they are. Not long after his walk of the harbour Bob took to instagram with a lengthy rant / discussion reflecting on his experience with the two paps that ‘papped’ him during his ‘private’ walk around Sydney Harbour. Here’s what he had to say…and some cheeky responses courtesy of yours truly.

“So I went for a walk yesterday in Sydney. I put a COVID mask on and my sunglasses so I could look at the world and not have it stare back. It worked. Quite blissful”

Mmm hmm Bob sounds like ya wanted to go incognito mate. Maybe leave the entourage back at the hotel next time. Better for blending in with the peasants that way innit.

“However,I was followed by two Paparazzi. One videoed me while the other took snaps. A remarkable thing happened. I wasn’t inflamed and I wasn’t racked with anxiety”

Good job Bob self soothing in the moment.

“The difference these days is the attention isn’t constant, It isn’t every day all day. As it happens while im here they have come looking for me. Usually though if a pap finds me, recently, it has been by mistake or luck for them.”

Strange that there might be any interest from the media in one of the world’s most famous musicians while they are on tour in Oz. Can’t imagine there’d be any interest in that kind of news.

“So, whether I wanted to be monitored for their financial gain and public consumption or not. They do it anyway. They take private moments without permission or consideration. I type this with no malice or anger. It is what it is.”

A walk around Sydney Harbour while ya here on tour is hardly a private moment Bob. If you were back in your room watching yourself on Netflix (and that’s friggin painful Bob, I watched the first episode of 40 minutes of your constant moaning) then that would be a private moment. Life is hard Bob. It is what it is. Now Bob are you being entirely truthful that there’s no malice or anger? Just sense a bit of passive aggressive Karate here mate.

“This then got me thinking about their home life and whether that ability to ‘’take anyway’’ is just an occupational hazard or if it bleeds into relationships?”

Yup passive aggressive Karate this is mate. Quite masterful. Black belt second dan I would say.

“Maybe if someone that’s in a relationship with a pap can fill us in, in the comment section?”

Well we spoke to the wife of one of the paps on the grounds she remain anonymous and this is what she had to say. “I’ve loved Robbie ever since he did that Angels song. He’s so talented and I just wish people would leave him alone. He’s absolutely right, my husband is so selfish, I just give and he just takes, he’s such a c@nt. Im so glad Robbie has spoken out and you know what I feel like it’s given me a kick in the butt and the strength I needed. Robbie is so inspirational. Im filing for divorce”

“And look im not interested to hear about ‘’What I signed up for- being famous’’ This is not an attack. I’m happy with that level of attention these days. I just wish I had a say in the matter.”

Hmmm, bit more karate here mate.

“In other news, Australia and its people is and are the best in the world.
Gods Country”

Ah love you too Bob

Jim Kardashian.


Namaste Bob

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Here’s Bob signalling the paps to fck off. Credit:

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