TRUMPED Prime Minister throws former Prime Minister under diplomatic bus to impress man who hates them both

In what experts are calling a masterclass in political self-preservation, Prime Minister Anthony Albanese has today publicly sacrificed former Prime Minister Kevin Rudd in a bid to stay on the good side of US President Donald Trump. A man who, we suspect, doesn’t really like either of them.

Albanese and Trump came face-to-face in Washington this morning during a bilateral meeting about critical minerals and the AUKUS deal. But things took a turn when Trump, known internationally for his subtlety and restraint, looked Rudd dead in the eye and said, “I don’t like you.”

The comment was made in response to a Sky News journalist who had questioned Trump as to whether he had been bothered by previous comments made about him by Australian Ambassador Rudd.

Unfazed, Rudd responded with what historians are already describing as a deeply unconvincing chuckle. The exchange reportedly left the room in an awkward silence only broken by the faint sound of Rudd’s dignity being gently steamrolled under the wheels of the nearest diplomatic bus.

While official parliamentarians such as senator Penny Wong have described the meeting as “a great success”, a screen grab from the moment is already being uploaded to the bank of go-to Australian political memes as we speak.